I've been thinking a lot lately.. there's not much else to do with my time... I've been pondering those questions that have bothered me for a long while... some for not so long, but still they are questions that must be pondered and possibly per-chance answered.

One of these things on which I have been pondering is the children's' mascot "Giddy Goanna". What is it about this particular goanna that makes it giddy? Has it been spinning in circles? Has it been one too many times on a ride at the show? What makes it giddy?

This was a source of much confusion for some time until I stumbled upon an answer provided by none other than the goanna itself, or, as it were, the goanna's clothing. This clothing would and should not be worn by anyone who has remained in full control of their own mind within the last score or two of years. This goanna, Giddy as it is named, is under the influence. Of what it is hard to say, but my guess would lie with marijuana.

That's right, my faithful readers (although few you number), that is correct. Marijuana. Pot. Weed. Grass. Green. Gunga. Mull. Whatever name you choose to take it by, it is none other than cannabis. That is what I propose fuels the giddiness of this goanna. How are those with children to feel once the truth is lain before them? This goanna which they so heartily trusted is none but a stoner, or a pot-head... an addict... The lowest common denominator.

This goanna, once a proud role-model for happy tykes everywhere, has been unmasked as the very thing that they must be protected from! How could any parent leave their child in the care of such a drug crazed creature? To add to this discomfort is the fact that Giddy Goanna is in fact a six foot tall reptile. Reptiles are not commonly known for their herbivorous nature, and one so 'high' and 'happy' on 'pot' is bound to at some point suffer from a condition referred to as 'the munchies'. For a 6 foot tall carnivorous reptile, a small child of the age of 10 or 11 is but little more than a light snack.

How long will it be? How long can this most foul of creatures, this "Giddy Goanna" continue on this path before destruction of discovery? How long until he eats another child? You must say "NO!" to your children! Say "NO!" to this 'Giddy Goanna'!

You must be alert, but not alarmed. These dodgy mascots are everywhere.

More deep thoughts at another time, but for now ponder me an answer to this question:

How can a statement that proclaims itself to be false?