Dear Dr Bob,
I have this awful problem, which I'm almost too embarrassed to mention.  I don't know if you'll be able to help me, but I'm at my wits' end.

I have five children, who have all grown up and left home.  One of them, the youngest, is so perfect in all ways, that I'm too embarrassed to let people know that I'm His mother.  Don't get me wrong, I'm very proud of Him, and love Him dearly, but I feel it would distress His loyal and devoted fans to know that His mother, in fact both His parents, were just ordinary people like them.  It must appear to them that He is descended from veritable Gods, but in fact it was two lowly mortals who are responsible for His "being".

How can I live with this awful knowledge?  My son is very good about it and tries not to make me feel like a lowly worm to be crushed under His enlightened feet.  He even promises that when His brothers and sister pay for the nursing home, it will be one of those upmarket ones with kerosene baths.  How thoughtful He is!

I feel it is almost impossible for me to live with the shame, the knowledge of who I am, and of how little significance when compared to Him.  Please help me, before I go insane...

-- Mum

Dear Mum,

First I would like to compliment you on having such a truly terrific son. I know how much the world needs people like him to impress the lower, 'common' folk, such as (as you stated) yourself. To feel shame for having parented someone as brilliant as he, is wrong.

Instead, you should feel awe. Pure. Awe. Awe is the correct emotion for any common person to display when thinking of or referring to someone so close to a god-like stature. You should feel awe that such a being could exist, and even greater awe that you have actually met him.

Insanity is also a correct reaction, as once you meet someone as splendorous and perfect as your son, you cannot help but realise how tiny you are compared to him. Do not fear that others will think less of you for being his parent, as they too, will be caught up in the fact that you have actually met him; on several occasions I might add.